Due Friday. I had all of mine thrown out. Entirely...so I am on the hook. So my mood and view is pretty neurotic and nuts...as I feel that I am just this side of the "special ed" room. My lines dont seem to work to match my brain. I am tumbling and rolling...in a very uncomfortable spot. As dear Ron Mazellen told me frankly, " you should feel that way...if you didn't nothing would be happening" and coming from that superstar painter illustrator...maybe I should just be patient with my pain and wait. Let it all percolate. Channel the happy vibes and beauty from Aubrey Beardsley and Jean Tuttle, Ludwig Hohlwein, Wanda Ga'g, Virginia Lee Burton and the newest members of the happiness parade, Alice and Martin Provensen's Animal Fair ( the first book Murray Tinkelman bought after his military service which, to me, is the cutest thing in the universe). Deep breath. Murray has been wonderful talking me off the ledge. He has said its okay for me to make spot illustrations, but we need to do the other thing...address the top three: horizon, reference and light source-- and make a real picture with a context, a placement, a horizon line.

We had a nice day of work--albeit mine was complicated and pretty unproductive. Tomorrow, its headset on--Ms. NonCommunication, Ms Leavemealone. Gotta buckle down, machine mode--and blast through this. I have my first thesis meeting with Doug Andersen which I am going to surface as an exploration of decorative illustration>> going deep. I plan on writing about Jean Tuttle and her work and look forward to Murray's talks next week on Decorative Illustration as a second hook to get me going. I need to seek and develop.

We had the Texas crit with our posh Residence Inn making us hamburgers and hot dogs. The work from the Texas Trip was unbelievable with my favorite, absolute favorite coming from Dan "the Man" ( was totally charmed by his witty tumbling cowboy and psycho cow) , with close seconds from the amazing painters in the group. Lori Ann Levi Holms knocked herself out with another tour de force 3-D interpretation of Texas. Unbelievable. She made cows and cowboys out of clay (glazed and fired) about 4" tall which she mounted in a foosball format (and they moved) with a painted background that absolutely rocked. Everyone laughed when the idea was floated that this was "art" and you know, I totally agree. This foosball Texas piece would sit in Miami at Art Basel Miami, NO PROBLEM. It was beautifully rendered...perfect.. She then brought down her children's book--another amazing 3D, working model. ROCKS. She is an amazing energy. Speaking of amazing energy, Jackie Becker did it again with a Cowgirl Armadillo--even better that the perfect Pasadena Garden Party Bear. The personification of charm. Mardi's pastel and gouache longhorn was unexpected and amazing. Chuck Primeau's Bacon/Action photo kinetic inspired cowboy being thrown from a bull was startling and another testament to his skills. The whole experience was a rich slice that I was delighted to partake of. The crowd liked both the Buffalo head and also the armadillo (which was a nice/nice but not a true picture for that assignment). Very positive...given the garbage I am generating by day.

Dennis Nolan gave us a lovely presentation of where he started, where he went, were the work goes and so on. His work is exquisite-- and meaningful. I loved his books, particularly the Once and Future King project which is quite beautiful and rich. Dennis lives in the detail...but his layouts are exquisite. He works in a limited palette--and builds it up in color from yellow, with red on top and finishing with blue--layering the color, building up the detail. It blows my mind. Makes me think about a limited palette beyond black white and a color. Hmmmm.

Its late once again. I am yawning so wide it hurts my jaw. Pray for productivity.

Peace.